[i am a medium. i channel the dead. my twin flame is a man who i believe may have been my childhood best friend, JE. he may have died tragically in a car accident at the age of four. i say "may" because, the truth is i do not know for sure what happened to JE. i was so very, very young and my memory of what became of him is practically non-existent. i just remember he was suddenly out of my life and as a child, i was very confused and hurt about it. i never forgot him and always referred to him when in conversation with friends and family. but as i grew up, whenever i asked my mother about him, her response was an amalgam of bizarre and conflicting stories. she would often tell me that no such person ever existed in the first place. other times, she would say he had existed but that his name was JO. and still others, she would insist that he was a she and that it was, in fact, a girl i was currently attending school with.
this matter has become so important to me because over the years, throughout my adulthood, i have become very close with an entity on the other side who goes by the name JE. and claims to be my old childhood friend. this ghost and i have become best friends over the time i have known him. i speak with him everyday and he assists me in a variety of aspects of my life. he is indispensable to me; his love, his companionship, his support. i've never met anyone whom i have loved so deeply, living or dead. but the truth of not being able to confirm his identity is breaking me in half. i have to know if he is indeed my little friend from preschool, JE. also, there is some question as to whether or not JE. is the real life brother of a man who i dated in college. i will call that man JA. i've been desperate to speak with JA., so i can ask him if he ever had a brother named JE. who passed away as a young child. sadly, that avenue has been blocked from me. so, finally i consulted an independent medium on the matter. the following is my portion of an ongoing conversation i am having with that medium].
[dear Y.,] the one who i showed you the picture of, the one called JA, decided to not accept my friend request on facebook. further, after i sent the request, he blocked me! it really hurt my feelings and i don't understand why he had to be so rude. when we dated all those years ago - he's the one who dumped me after cheating on me! so i'm not sure why he would still want to exclude me from his life. it's not like i was the one who broke his heart. :(
JE., his possible brother on the other side, and i still communicate daily. he is still just as loving to me. i've been trying to work up the courage to ask another medium about his identity, whether or not he is JA.'s brother [Y. had been able to confirm several aspects of JE.'s identity except for whether or not he was JA.'s brother. on that matter, she could get nothing either way]. i spoke to a professional medium several months ago before you and i communicated, and her response was mixed and confusing. at first, she said they were not brothers, then she kept referring to them as brothers, and then finally she said, "it's up to you." she suggested i "test" him by pulling away from the relationship, if he is truly my childhood friend, then he will not begrudge me this and will let me have my space. if it is not JE., but someone masquerading as him, she said, he will get upset and try to cling on to you. so i followed her advice and JE. allowed me to pull away peacefully without any resistance. he said he would not try to force a connection if i didn't want one. so i felt that pretty much told me it must be JE. according to her advice. he is very gentle and loving to me. so unlike JA.
still, i wish i could get some objective confirmation that the two are brothers. the JE. of my childhood disappeared from my life when we were both very young and i can not remember his last name. my mother will not tell me. to make matters worse, i'm not even one hundred percent certain that JE., my childhood friend, died at all! i have heart wrenching memories of a car accident, but i'm not fully confident they're legitimate because i was so young. i'm terribly afraid they're only "created memories." what i do know is that he suddenly vanished from my life and my mother acted so weird about it. when i would ask her about him, sometimes she said he moved away, other times she said she didn't know who i was talking about and that i was mistaken and had never even known a JE.! i was certain that i had. it was not like me to have imaginary friends as a young child. and still other times, when i would ask her about him, she would look at me and say, "paola, it's a good thing you no longer know him, you two were too close anyway.” a few times she confessed that it was her and my teachers who separated us and put us on different tracks at school so that our socializing skills could more develop more "properly." i do know that we were inseparable and would often seclude ourselves off in a corner and play, not welcoming other children to join us. as i got older, however, she refused to acknowledge that he even existed, though sometimes she'd slip and refer to him quite plainly. it was her bizarre behavior, combined with my memory of a car accident and the continual manifestations from an entity named JE. on the other side, which lead me to believe that my little friend had, in fact, passed away and my mom, not knowing how to explain it to me, fed me all this contradictory stuff that made no sense. it wouldn't be the first time she has lied about something so important.
when i dated JA, he was very secretive about his family, so i don't remember him ever saying he had a brother who died - but then, it would be like him to not mention something like that.
needless to say, i've been in a lot of emotional pain about the issue because i'd like it to be resolved one way or the other so i can put the matter to rest. the spirit i've been in contact with for years now, who i've understood to be JE. from preschool, means everything to me. but i am in deep turmoil not knowing for certain if he is who i think he is: JE., brother of JA, JE., my childhood friend.
as always, thank you for listening to me, Y. you always have a knack for making me feel comfortable opening up to you. i hope you and yours have a great easter holiday, if you celebrate it. :)
namaste,
this matter has become so important to me because over the years, throughout my adulthood, i have become very close with an entity on the other side who goes by the name JE. and claims to be my old childhood friend. this ghost and i have become best friends over the time i have known him. i speak with him everyday and he assists me in a variety of aspects of my life. he is indispensable to me; his love, his companionship, his support. i've never met anyone whom i have loved so deeply, living or dead. but the truth of not being able to confirm his identity is breaking me in half. i have to know if he is indeed my little friend from preschool, JE. also, there is some question as to whether or not JE. is the real life brother of a man who i dated in college. i will call that man JA. i've been desperate to speak with JA., so i can ask him if he ever had a brother named JE. who passed away as a young child. sadly, that avenue has been blocked from me. so, finally i consulted an independent medium on the matter. the following is my portion of an ongoing conversation i am having with that medium].
[dear Y.,] the one who i showed you the picture of, the one called JA, decided to not accept my friend request on facebook. further, after i sent the request, he blocked me! it really hurt my feelings and i don't understand why he had to be so rude. when we dated all those years ago - he's the one who dumped me after cheating on me! so i'm not sure why he would still want to exclude me from his life. it's not like i was the one who broke his heart. :(
JE., his possible brother on the other side, and i still communicate daily. he is still just as loving to me. i've been trying to work up the courage to ask another medium about his identity, whether or not he is JA.'s brother [Y. had been able to confirm several aspects of JE.'s identity except for whether or not he was JA.'s brother. on that matter, she could get nothing either way]. i spoke to a professional medium several months ago before you and i communicated, and her response was mixed and confusing. at first, she said they were not brothers, then she kept referring to them as brothers, and then finally she said, "it's up to you." she suggested i "test" him by pulling away from the relationship, if he is truly my childhood friend, then he will not begrudge me this and will let me have my space. if it is not JE., but someone masquerading as him, she said, he will get upset and try to cling on to you. so i followed her advice and JE. allowed me to pull away peacefully without any resistance. he said he would not try to force a connection if i didn't want one. so i felt that pretty much told me it must be JE. according to her advice. he is very gentle and loving to me. so unlike JA.
still, i wish i could get some objective confirmation that the two are brothers. the JE. of my childhood disappeared from my life when we were both very young and i can not remember his last name. my mother will not tell me. to make matters worse, i'm not even one hundred percent certain that JE., my childhood friend, died at all! i have heart wrenching memories of a car accident, but i'm not fully confident they're legitimate because i was so young. i'm terribly afraid they're only "created memories." what i do know is that he suddenly vanished from my life and my mother acted so weird about it. when i would ask her about him, sometimes she said he moved away, other times she said she didn't know who i was talking about and that i was mistaken and had never even known a JE.! i was certain that i had. it was not like me to have imaginary friends as a young child. and still other times, when i would ask her about him, she would look at me and say, "paola, it's a good thing you no longer know him, you two were too close anyway.” a few times she confessed that it was her and my teachers who separated us and put us on different tracks at school so that our socializing skills could more develop more "properly." i do know that we were inseparable and would often seclude ourselves off in a corner and play, not welcoming other children to join us. as i got older, however, she refused to acknowledge that he even existed, though sometimes she'd slip and refer to him quite plainly. it was her bizarre behavior, combined with my memory of a car accident and the continual manifestations from an entity named JE. on the other side, which lead me to believe that my little friend had, in fact, passed away and my mom, not knowing how to explain it to me, fed me all this contradictory stuff that made no sense. it wouldn't be the first time she has lied about something so important.
when i dated JA, he was very secretive about his family, so i don't remember him ever saying he had a brother who died - but then, it would be like him to not mention something like that.
needless to say, i've been in a lot of emotional pain about the issue because i'd like it to be resolved one way or the other so i can put the matter to rest. the spirit i've been in contact with for years now, who i've understood to be JE. from preschool, means everything to me. but i am in deep turmoil not knowing for certain if he is who i think he is: JE., brother of JA, JE., my childhood friend.
as always, thank you for listening to me, Y. you always have a knack for making me feel comfortable opening up to you. i hope you and yours have a great easter holiday, if you celebrate it. :)
namaste,
© 2009 Copyright by Paola Lopez
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